I was complaining recently about a midterm that I took in a theology class. The class is lecture-based and we have outlines given to us of all of the lectures. So some days it feels very passive. And for the exam we just had to spit back out some of the lesson materials we’d been given. So I was frustrated, feeling like the class wasn’t much use. But this morning I got to thinking about how little I’ve been putting into the class. If I get little out of it, that’s likely because I’m not dwelling on the material. I’m not wrestling with the questions the professor is presenting. I’m not making an intentional effort to do unassigned readings to see what others have to say about these issues. When I come to class, I bring nothing with me. Sure, a laptop and notebook and pen, but nothing contributory.

There’s also another class I have that I’ve been complaining about. It’s a class that’s designed to teach students how to do research, especially in theological fields. Since 1) I’m primarily studying Philosophy and 2) I feel that I am already competent in my ability to do research, I feel that the class is a waste of my time and money.

But I’m going about this all wrong. My focus is too narrow. Why am I complaining about these classes? What is important is not whether I’m personally benefiting from every hour I spend in class, but whether I am becoming more educated by my experience here at Talbot. There will always be nit-picky details to complain about. Get over it, James. Stop whining. Grow up. Spend less time belly-aching and more time doing what’s important, like actually learning and drawing closer to Jesus and blessing other people.

I want to re-read some missionary biographies in order to help shift my focus from the immediate to the long-term. God, grant me vision, a holy ambition, a place to set my sights and run toward. Let my life be more than the mundane, even in the midst of the mundane. Give me eyes to see the enormity of your work in this world and the magnitude of your glory.

Written at 3:49 pm         ||         Filed under: General

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